I used to walk frequently, and for long periods of time, in the desert. Never gave it much thought, really. I used to pack a sandwich, some chips, and a cooler full of beer, and drive out to my "thought spot," which was really an area that was a few square miles of dry, cactus, mesquite, and creosote bush covered area. It could be 100+ degrees in temperature, but I used to walk for up to 2 hours or more without even thinking about carrying water with me. The beer always tasted good, of course, when I did get back to the car!
But I used to talk to the brush, the cactus, the birds and lizards, and, of course to God while I was out there. In fact, talking to God was one of the reasons that I started going out on those long walks. Those conversations didn't always sound all that nice at times. I have been known to be pretty strong when it comes to speaking my mind, and it doesn't matter to who. If I think they've done wrong, I don't mind telling them, and that includes God.
And you are saying, I suppose, "what kind of a sane mind believes that they have the right and responsibility of telling God that he screwed up," right? He's got to be addled. And maybe you are right, and maybe I have a different sense of God than you do, and He and I share a mutual respect - or at least I think we do, or is that, really, I hope we do.
We covered some pretty serious subjects out there on those walks. I probably took a dozen of those "venting" walks before I finally realized that this really was a two way conversation. I would go out and at times scream at Him for things that was happening. And like most people, I would ask a question directed at Him, and wait to listen to what I would hear if anything, just as if He was going to materialize and start talking. But one day it was different.
I said all the ugly things I normally say, and then started to say more things. And it was when I actually thought about what I was saying that I realized that something had happened, as I wasn't saying things or seeing them in the same way. I realized that although I had not heard a sound with my "ears," God had obviously spoken "through" me to me, as what I was saying was looking at the same thing from a different point of view! Yes, I actually DID have my questions answered, I just wasn't paying attention to what He was saying, as I was listening with my ears, not with my mind and heart.
So before you say you never heard God say a thing to you, stop and ask yourself, was I listening with just my ears or was I really open minded for an answer? My biggest regret at this time is that I didn't realize "how" to listen for God's replies when I was much younger and was trying to find a way out of the mess I had made of my life. If I had known then what I believe I know now, my world would be so much different. And this entry is going to start a group of I don't know how many that will reveal some of the things that we discussed. I hope you read them with an open mind, as in many ways, He is talking through my fingers.
Friday, October 12, 2012
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